5 Really Stupid Questions from Interviewers

If you could be any kind of tree, what would it be?

The most stupid questions I've ever received are in the form of written story problems. The interviewer gives you a sheet of paper with X number of story problems with plenty of white space for you to write down your calculations on your way to solving meaningless, trivial situations completely unrelated to the job you're interviewing for.

Who gives a real crap about what time a plane leaving NYC at 4pm EDT will land in LA while incurring wind sheer at 4.7 SPS over the Midwest and then experiencing wind sheer elevated to 11.8 SPS over the Rockies?

When an interviewer gives me a sheet full of story problems, I always give it right back to them without even looking at it. I tell them that I don't do story problems written on a piece of paper. I tell them to give me a computer, a keyboard and a mouse and I'll solve the stupid problems for them, and if they can't do that right then and there, then I don't want to work for them anyway. I have never NOT landed a job when taking this approach.

Interviewers don't need to waste their time being psychoanalysts. They should just concentrate on finding the right candidate for the open position and cut out the extra fluff because it wastes people's time.

Ironically, I was discussing stupid interview questions at a job interview the other day (not for a HR position, it just came up in the course of conversation)... and my interviewer volunteered that if he were an animal, he would be a pug. I was highly entertained.

I was asked "tell me one thing no one knows about you". Since this was for a state government job I was completely taken aback by this question. It was the first question out of the man's mouth.

I was completely speechless and then I muttered something about being competitive. Which made no sense. What I was really thinking however, was this: "if I told you that, I'd have to kill you just like all the others". But, being a government job I felt that was really not the right response.

What a complete and total waste of time these psycho babble questions are. Do HR people really believe they are going to get insight into anyone who is trying to make an impression to get a job? And don't get me started on the companies that use those insulting personality tests .... Unicru being the most heinious of all.

The most stupidest questions I have gotten from a Interviewer are from Canadian Tire, they give you a sheet of paper with around 100 - 120 questions and about 90% - 95% are about the same exact thing just worded differently.

You can have a lot of fun with stupid questions, depending on your interest in the job. I've gone on interviews where I quickly realize that I wouldn't work for this company ever. So when they ask you, "How do you feel about working long hours?" Don't answer the question...say "My favorite animal is horses or I like the color red or I play tennis, etc." The "deer in the headlights look from the interviewer is priceless"...and either you get hauled off to the nearest mental ward or they offer you a job based on creativity and the ability to recognize nonsense. The other tactic is to simply say, I'm not a "Muppet or a Tree" but if that's who you are looking to hire....I think Burt and Ernie are unemployed and there is a fine looking oak just outside your door.

Be in charge...or be intimidated.

I was once asked what my first memory was. It was odd talking about my childhood and parents in an interview. I'm not sure if there was any point to it, or if it was merely meant to break the ice.

I was once asked in an interview,"have you ever pissed on yourself?" my obvious answer was no. I was then called a liar. My statement should have been, "not to my knowlege I have not, I am sure when I was a baby I did".

After several years of employment and a great relationship with the person who asked me that question, I was told what my answer should have been.

I had an interviewer ask me, "Gary, are you a tiger?" Of course I knew what he meant, but the tone of his voice was serious and he was reading canned interview questions. I thought about jumping up on the table and growling for a second. I sort of chuckled and said that I knew what he meant and I can be aggressive when I need to be.

Another one told me how much money he was making and basically asked me if I wanted to be like him. I looked at his inexpensive suit, Rolex copy and bad haircut, bit my tongue and said that I want to be very sucessful at any job that I do.

It is also good to be aware, when the interviewer asks you to take a personality test. They truly believe that your answers are indicative to whether you can do the job. These tests are ILLEGAL and if asked, you should politely remind them of that fact.

I remember I was asked to take a test and "rate myself" on one page and then "rate how other's percieve me" on the other page. I found out later that if the two scores did not correlate, they wouldn't hire you. What is really interesting, the company went out of business this past year. Karma?

I was once asked "What is the most creative thing you have done"...I thought I was being pretty funny when I said "My resume". Obviously I didn't get that job.

@Marianne -- Hi, I love your perspective on this issue. Your tactic of being playful can work quite well if you really don't care about the outcome of the interview and if the interviewer will go along with you.

Your strategy highlights the core issue when responding to any interview question... Whatever the interviewer asks you, use it as an opportunity to convey the messages you want to send.

Watch the politicians. A politician rarely answers a question directly. Reporters usually ask questions to solicit newsworthy comments like, “What specifically are you going to do Mr. President, to solve the ______ crisis?” The politician uses the reporter’s question to communicate the messages they wish to send. The reporter (interviewer) thought they had control over the politician (interviewee), but in reality the person being asked the question is in total control of the messages communicated through their response.

One time in high school, I had an interview at Build-a-Bear. During the interview I was asked, "name something where you had to do more than one thing at a time" I couldn't think of anything worthy to say although i had various thoughts in my head, showering while texting, drinking and driving (non alcoholic of course!)

For some reason I went blank.

@Tracy: How about this as a response: "No I have no memory of pissing on myself but your question is really pissing me off."

Or you might say. "I'll answer almost any question you might ask me as long as you are willing to also respond to the same question."

All The Best

@Gary, You are much more tactful than I might have been. Really stupid interview questions like these really piss me off. They have no business in the interview room.

If asked if I was a tiger I might have replied, “No, I’m more like a Jaguar. They have no predators and absolutely no fear. If you don’t start asking meaningful job-related questions I might just bite your head off and leave.”

Well maybe I wouldn’t have said that, but certainly might have thought it.

@Corinne   Interviewers are under the hallucination that people actually do more than one thing at a time. Leaving bodily functions out of the discussion for now, let's consider this: If we have 100% of our attention to spread across 3 tasks, we cannot do a good job on any of the tasks because we only have 33% of our focus devoted to each task. Result: We can’t do anything very well.

In reality, humans only can focus on one thing at a time and do it well. We might focus on one task for one moment and then move to another task. But at any given moment we are only focusing on one thing at a time.

Automobile accident reports are filled with people who tried to multitask driving with talking on the phone, texting, eating, drinking or any number of other tasks that distracted them from driving. The result of this multitasking was someone got hurt. FYI, there are 85 auto accidents in the US every hour of every day. Maybe we should stop trying to multitask and interviewers should stop hallucinating.

I really want to know what your response is suppose to be when they ask you what your weakness is. I absolutely hate that question with passion and I never know what to answer because I don't usually sit around and think negatively about myself.

I was once asked if I was planning on having children in the future- this was from a campus police dept. You would think that these idiots would know what an illegal question was and not ask something so moronic.

Stupid interview questions is one thing but insulting or humiliating questions are another. If someone asked me if I have ever pissed on myself....first of all I would say that is the most unprofessional question I have ever been asked and probably get up and walk out. Those question can be ok if your sitting around a bunch of good friends....Maybe...but in an interview they are totally inappropriate.

Finally! I'm so glad the issue of stupid interview questions has been addressed. Not only do I hate stupid interview questions, I hate stupid canned interview questions read from lists by a panel. I think stupid interview tactics should be the next topic of discussion. If I am going to give 110% to a job and research the company, the least thing an organization can do is figure out what position or skills are actually needed. I can't tell you how many times I have interviewed for a position, been hired and found out the job wasn't even close to what was described in the interview, even after my questions to the company! They say they need a manager and my skills fit the criteria, I am hired and the position becomes a "coordinator" which is a catch-all euphemism for "we need someone to clean up this mess we've made". Or " we've hired you to do this, but really mean this". I have been seriously burned and who ends up with a spotty resume? Me. To add insult to injury? Canned lists of dumb interview questions from an inept panel!! "Where do you see yourself in five years?" is a dead giveaway of poor management. The next time they tell me it's a panel interview or "coordinator" is in the job title, I will avoid it like the plague. It means poor management decision making ability and subsequently poor interviewing questions and tactics. Do your homework employers! Ask me what you really want to know about me, but do your homework and learn how to interview in an intelligent, respectful, and legal manner!! Anyone else experience this? Weigh in, please.

bullets is always a good answer.

When asked what your weakness is simply state something rediculously obvious.
In my case I am bald and I might say "I have a hard time conditioning my hair."
If you want to throw them for a loop say "I like to focus on my strengths. Weakness, once noticed are only temporary."

I resently had an interview for a job I wanted very badly. It was perfect for me hours, pay, location, skills needed, they asked me to take a personality test, they also asked me where I saw myself in 5 years. I felt a little odd taking the test (I didn't know they were illegal) after all how is asking me if taking $5 the same as taking office supplies going to help in a job where I answer the phone? There was also A LOT of math on the test which I also found very odd. The thing that really bothered me was the test was supposed to take 2 hours (or so) I finished it in 50 min. I probably finished it too soon.

The best interview I ever had went like this; we discussed hobbies, families, etc., then I got a tour with introductions. At the end I was aske if I still wanted the job. I affirmed and was given the scenario for drug test, ID badge, etc. and told if I didn't hear from HR with an appointment for these and orientation within one week to call. All the interview questions were covered in the resume and would have been redundant. They wanted me, the interview was to confirm their decision and make sure they could get along with me in a work setting. I've been to those " other "interviews. I'm getting old andfeel that if it takes more than one to interview me, or if they feel the need to ask me to answer questions that have already been answered, They aren't competent enough for me to work for. Just wanted you to know that all interviewers aren't a**holes. If they are, you should keep looking !

This is a really great issue to address. I like to give the benefit of the doubt whenever possible, so I have to admit that this is an innovative tactic for interviewers. However, it is blown out of proportion and was a focus of my rant in a videotaped contest in a CareerBuilder.com booth at a local fair. I hate to see the same job posting week after week and think about how many possible candidates were turned down because some pencil-pushing HR person is attempting to find the perfect person using some kind of algorithm.

During an interview for a Physician's Office R.N. position, as a 52 yr old returning to work post children, I was being told what the starting wage was.....(at least 15-20$/hr less than hosp) I responded with "I thought it would be more than that?!"....to which the Dr's wife responded..."Oh! you need money??

I just about fell off the chair. Believe it or not, I do working there....but would love to find another PT position with better pay (but the hours are good with the family life).

I recall one interview questionaire that asked this : have you ever fanticized about killing your co-workers?   not a difficult question in itself, however i said "yes, and as a matter of fact i have often dreamed about throwing the people who write these kinds of questions off of a rooftop." they were not amused and called security to escort me from the building...hahhahah

The fact remains that most HR people are complete incompetent idiots and wouldn't know a qualified candidate if he or she fell on them.

I have heard two of these questions and I am only 21. I have heard the "What animal are you?", and the "Where do you see yourself in five years?" The animal one I just said I was a dog because I was loyal and would not leave (BS'ed that one after telling him that it was a weird question). They ended up firing me two days before Christmas without warning (a******s). And the five years question came with the job I have now and that was the BIGGEST thing he wanted to know mainly because he wanted to keep people in the company as long as possible even if it means trying to change your mind about where you want to go (after I got the job I told him I wanted to go to UNLV to study Hosp. Mang. and he tried to convince me to go somewhere else closer to to company even if it meant going to a lesser school) but it is like I'm 21 I have switched my major three times in the last three years and have changed what I want to do with my majors three times too, I really have no clue where I will be in five years but college and work who knows where. Dumb question.

Oh yes, I've gotten the manhole cover question. The interviewer had the nerve to tell me that my answer was wrong, even though I looked it up later and my answer was among the correct ones. He also asked questions like, "What are your worst qualities" and never asked me what my best ones are.

When I moved from Illinois to Arizona I gt asked the same dumb a** question in every interview and since I had over 100 when I first moved here it got old - the question was "So, what brought you to Arizona" then I had to go through the whole job got downsized and I moved - period. Finally I started saying "a big truck and my car" DUH ! But one day I was in a particular foul mood and I knew I didnt want the job at that point and I said "well once my parole allowed me to move after killing my husband, there was nothing really left to hold me in Illinois" lol - I think the guy is still picking up his jaw off the floor. Or the one I really like is asking someone like me who has 25 years in my chosen career, "So do you really like accounting?" Uh no actually I hate it thats why I tortured myself through school and working every day for the last 25 years - "here's your sign."

I used to say that my one weakness was that I was too hard on myself (I really am) and that I always want to learn a new job all at once and be the expert in my field with any company as I have been in the past at my other positions. That shows that you care about your job and that you have been considered very good at it also.

It kind of shows your strength in a way at the same time.

As an aging worker, I have been exposed to those IQ tests, complete with the old school boss's slipping behind me to "give" me the answers, like I was too dumb to answer the questions. In the current work force, the managers and interviewers are average age 30 somethings, who do not know crap. My current manager told me she only wanted people like herself around her, then hired me and then in my first review told me I just wasn't what she was looking for. I told her I was proud of that and that I did not need her to validate my job performance, I knew I was doing a great job, despite her. She has backed off and lets me do my job, it is time for another performance evaluation and she is avoiding me, however I got the raise. what crap!

At the time of the interview I had a lot of extra poundage, Yes I was fat ok. So I am sitting in the Chief of Police's office for my final interview.

So he looks right at me and says "well I see your kind of heavy have you ever sat in a chair and broken it" I did well to control the anger that must have shown in my facial expression. I did get the job but in those few seconds I decided that if I didnt get the job, a lawsuit would be forthcoming.

I recently had the WORST interview of my life! I had posted my resume on monster.com and got an e-mail back from this company saying they liked what they saw and wanted me to come in for an interview. Before the interview, I wanted to do a little research on the company so I checked out their website. It looked like it would be just what I wanted so I got really excited. I went in for the interview and brought another copy of my resume for them to look at, even though it says the same thing as what they had already read. I was disgusted by the look of the office- it was in one of those cheap business parks where you rent part of the building for a while. The floor was covered in stains and gum, there were displays of companies that this place clearly didn't work with, and so many more small things that my heart almost sank to the floor when I walked in!

Anyway, my interview consisted of me sitting there while the interviewer read my resume out loud and then asked me to basically reiterate what they just read. What really irked me was that I was asked to explain what I did at my current job many different times with questions that were only slightly worded differently. The only other questions she asked were extremely personal and now I know, illegal. Worse though was that she lied to me about the job and the company to get me come back the next day for "a few hours to observe an event." What she should have said is: "you get to spend literally all day an hour away from here and someone else is driving and get to do something completely different from what I told you our company was about!"

The next woman I had to "interview" with was totally rude and did nothing but put me down and cut me and everyone else around her off. She spent SO MUCH time texting and calling her friends to plan their night out later on and the clubs they were going to go to. I was ready to leave before we even got to the "event!" Every question she asked me was ridiculous and completely pointless! I just wanted to scream!!! I should have listened to my gut when I first got there and they asked me to sign a piece of paper saying I wouldn't demand payment for "the day of observation" I was going on...

I recently had a phone interview with all sorts of stupid/irrelevant questions. I didn't get the job probably because I didn't BS enough. One question was for me to close my eyes and describe how I tie my shoes. Another was this long story about being at a dinner party with a bunch of big wigs from work and they serve steak, but when they bring it to me it's cooked wrong, what do I do send it back, fuss about it, or just eat it. I didn't know what to say. I just said I would eat it anyways. Anyways, that was the worse interview I ever had! I don't like phone interviews to begin with but none of the questions related to my experience or knowledge or anything to do with the job. I really did want that job. Later I found that they hired someone with way less experience than me and in the field that it is... I wouldn't want to be a customer/patient at that facility!

Thanks for all these great comments everyone! For those interested, intrigued and annoyed by the "What Is Your Greatest Weakness?" question, we have more advice in this new blog post:

What do you think is your greatest weakness?

- Michael

I've been asked and have asked the "How many piano tuners are there in the city of Chicago?" question.

That one can show problem solving skills and confidence. If they don't ask the simple question of the population of Chicago (or something else relevant) then I know there might be an issue.

If I were asked about Muppets, trees or tigers I would likely respond that one of my strengths is to focus on the job I'm supposed to be doing and not be distracted by superfluous sideline distractions so they should please ask me the next question since I spend my time on what's important.

I'd do it in an "assertive" way and not be sarcastic...just state the facts.

Always remember that you are interviewing them as much as they are interviewing you.

I don't have an interview horror story but I would like to know what the Seinfled reference to manhole covers is. The link in the article just goes to the home page of the show.

The other article on HEBIG.org was brilliant and reminded me of a question a prospective employer asked me: How many tennis balls can fit inside the TransAmerica building in San Francisco?

I gave a well thought out answer explaining how round objects are packed and even got the volume of the building. This was an email questionnaire so I had time to do the research. They loved my technical answer and asked me to come in. I ended up not taking the job because of the extremely long commute.

When I had my interview for [company name] I had to do an writen one first. One of the qustions asked " what who you do if you had one millon dollas ?" I can't remember What i put, something dumb I bet.

I got the job, and later I found out that my boss only kept that on there 'cus she thought it was funny to read what people would put.

@ Greg -- Thanks for the comment, especially the "tennis balls" question. The "Seinfeld" reference had nothing to do with manhole covers. It was merely a reference to how the show dealt with a lot of minutiae in life.

I had an interview with a panel of 5 people, which ran roughly an hour. Toward the end of the interview, one person asked me, "If your closest friends could tell me one thing about you, what would it be?" The question was so unnecessary. Obviously, one can't speak for what a friend might say, let alone a collective.

So after an hour's time conversing with 5 strangers, my first thought was to say, "I don't wear underwear to interviews," which made me panic, and I ended up answering, "I'm smart. Really, really smart."

My friends and I have laughed about my answer for years... oh, by-the-way, the organization offered me the position, but I didn't accept their salary offer, because I'm really, really smart.

I was asked a series of inappropriate questions at my very first ever job interview. 1) How old are you? 2) How sdmuch do you weigh? 3) Are you married and how many children do you have? Being young and not knowing they were illegal questions I answered them. If someone were to ask these questions now I would speak-up and say I would not answer them.

I was at the same place for 18 years, then merged with another before I left.
The question to the person who had 25 years of accounting experience if she liked accounting, reminded me of an interview question, that I had.
I was in travel, interviewer asked if I made money for the company.
Of course, I said. I really wwanted to say : "No, they just kept me there because my complexion blended with the wallpaper !