Pongo Resume

In the courtroom, you NEVER ask a witness a question unless you already know the answer. Every lawyer from Atticus Finch to Denny Crane has taught us that.

And the same principle holds true for your job references: NEVER list anyone as a reference unless you know they'll speak highly of you.

I read a newsletter recently that included a question from a woman who'd been given a bad reference, and, as a result, did not get the job. She was especially ticked because the hiring manager would not tell her which former employer had badmouthed her (that's a pretty typical policy, BTW.)

In the reply, executive coach Joan Lloyd rightly stated that it was the woman's own responsibility to figure out who the naysayer was and revise her reference list accordingly. Taking that one step further, I would add that the bad reference was the woman's own fault because she obviously failed to check her own references before she gave them out.

OK, I confess I've done the same thing. We probably all have. But we also know the risks you run when you assume that anyone you list as a reference will talk about you in glowing terms.

I know it can be awkward to contact an old boss or colleague to ask for a favor. If you really can't face doing it yourself, there are fee-based services that will check your references for you.

But there are at least three powerful reasons to just do it yourself:

1. It's the polite thing to do.

It's simply not cool to submit someone's name and contact information to another party without their knowledge and consent. If there's time, make your request by email to avoid putting the person on the spot – which brings me to my next point:

2. It gives them a chance to say NO.

There are all sorts of reasons a person might NOT want to be a reference for you (which may or may not have anything to do with you). When asking someone to be your reference, it's important that you give them an easy way out. If you just ask point-blank, "Can I use you as a reference?", they'll probably feel obliged to say yes, even if they want to say no. To be safe, always include a line such as:

"If you wouldn't feel comfortable providing a positive reference, please feel free to  decline. I know a lot of employers frown on giving out references these days, so I completely understand if you can't do it."

That way, they can save face by saying, "I wish I could, but it's against company policy." The last thing you need is to have someone agree to provide a reference, only to damn you with faint praise.

3. It allows you to coach them on what to say.

Once you have an enthusiastic yes from your reference, go ahead and let them know what you'd like them to share (or not share) with your prospective employers. You're actually doing them a favor by providing suggestions, since they might find it tough to come up with specific compliments off the cuff. Don't write a script, but give them some ideas by using such statements as:

• "I'm applying for ___ jobs, so I'd appreciate if you could address my ___ qualifications more than my ___ skills."
• "It would be great if you could mention my success on the ___ team. Remember that time we were up against that crazy deadline with no budget?"
• "They seem really interested in my ___ background, so if you could mention how that's one of my biggest strengths, it would definitely help my case."

I also highly recommend sending a copy of your current resume and cover letter to all your references so they can see exactly what you're saying about yourself. It will help refresh their memories of what you did for them and give them ideas of other nice things to say about you.

On a related note, if you're asking your references for an online recommendation on LinkedIn, help them with some reference material, such as this one from JibberJobber.com.

On another related note, don't put "References Available upon Request" on your resume. Of course you'll provide references if they ask – you don't have to waste valuable resume space spelling it out.

Bottom line: Pre-screening your references is the best way to avoid the surprise stab in the back. When it comes to bad references, there's no cure, only prevention.

UPDATE 10/08: Here's a link with some suggestions for bad-reference damage control!

Have you had employment references who really helped or hurt your job search efforts? Add your thoughts or questions to the Comments box and we'll post a reply!

I love your idea of giving a copy of your resume/cover letter to the people you list as a reference to keep them on point.

I gave a reference for former co-worker and current friend just the other day. I really wanted to sing her praises but I was caught off guard by the call and my poor kids were fussy in the background. I spoke very highly of her, but I'm not sure I did it in the most professional way because when I answered, I was unprepared.

All ended well, she got the job!

I recently was laid off and now my employer is not giving a good reference. I know I do not have to list him, however, I am concerned in what he can say and can not say since there was never any actions taken or any discussions about what he is stating

Chris,

Sorry to hear about the layoff, and especially to hear that your former boss is making things worse. You're right, you don't have to list him as a reference, and clearly you shouldn't, since he's definitely not helping your cause.

You said you're concerned about what he can or cannot say, and by that I assume you mean legally. I can't answer that directly (having no legal credentials), but I can point out that he's saying what he's saying, whether it's legal or not.

Therefore, I would say your best option is to list a former colleague as your reference for that company, if there is someone you know and can verify will give you a good reference.

Otherwise, provide references from elsewhere, and be sure to coach them on the kind of things you'd like them to say to help prove your value to your NEXT employer.

Good luck! Julie

i just finished my first resume, ever. and i dont know whether i should add references or not. if you could answer my question, itd be a lot of help.

thank you.

Hi Paola, No, you should not include references on the resume.

Do prepare a list of references, and be ready to present them if asked, but even so, they should be a separate document from the resume.

Typically an employer will ask for your references during the interview process (and it's usually a good sign if they do).

The exception, of course, is if the job ad specifically asks for references up front.

Best of luck! Julie

Ms. O'Malley,

I have a question about job application forms. Some hiring managers contact former employers listed on application forms.

If an applicant worked for his/her employer for many years, but left due to a negative rapport with a new manager, what should the applicant do?

Eliminating the company from the application shows a gap in employment. Additionally, some application forms do not offer the option of "Can we contact this person?"

Some hiring managers ask applicants to sign a permission form allowing them to contact current and former employers. How should an applicant handle this situation, especially if the hiring manger decides to contact former employers instead of provided references?

How should an applicant handle this situation?

-M

Thanks for the question, M.

It can actually be a good strategy to leave some blanks on an application form. If the interviewer asks WHY you left out information, it's much better to be able to explain the situation verbally. You might say something like, "I was hesitant to list the manager's name for that position because the bulk of my experience was with the previous manager. I had a very successful 5 years working with Jane Jones. I only worked for the new manager for a few months." You can explain that there was a conflict with the current manager. That way, even if they do wind up contacting the new manager, they get your side of the story first.

-Julie

Hi

I just have a question...

A while ago i applied for a job and was successful. The company had gotten hold of all my references which all gave great feedback. I was accepted for the position on the monday and on the tues got a call back saying the my position had been withdrawn due to someone coming back to them with a new reference. Is there any way at all in finding out who this person was that went back to the company with a different story.

Michelene

why do american companies and others use these "references/recs" anyway, they are USELESS. the best way to vet an applicant is via interviews, tough interviewing, and accomplishments. Period. people leave jobs b/c the job sucks. period. of course there is animosity, of course there is dislike, so why on earth would corporate imbeciles use past people/refs and give them any merit? it will be tainted, colored, etc....terry nickell dimed etc...

Hi, I am wondering if it is necessary to use your previous boss/supervisor as the reference. I think they are the best if you know they will give great feedbacks. However, all my previous bosses are no longer with the company and one had passed away (and I didn't really get alone with my most recent supervisor although I am confident she will give great reviews.) Should I explain the situation as to why none of my references is my superior or the employers generally don't think twice about a potential employee not using their bosses as references.

Thanks

So, what happens if you know your listed references will give you a good review, and the office manager (NOT listed on reference list) intervenes and gives a bad reference? Is that legal? The reference check was a letter that was addressed to the doctor and the office manager went so far as to call the inquiring employer and rip me to shreds using a performance review that was given to me 3 months after I finished school and not on how my perfomance was when I left...14 months later! It was so bad that the would be employer finally had to hang up on her because she wouldn't stop going on and on! That person was not on my list!!! What can I do? Thanks.

@Michelle C.

Realistically, you probably can't do anything about the bad reference she gave, but you can rest assured that the inquiring employer probably recognized that it was SHE who had the problems not you.

Depending on your relationship with the doctor you worked for, perhaps you can speak directly to him or her and ask how to handle future reference checks. Or... choose a different reference.

Good luck! And I'm sorry that happened to you.

Julie